Betta Fish: He doesn’t know how special he is

I was just feeding my betta bubbles and started crying because i’ve been seeing signs of aging. Also just to clarify, i’ve been battling fin rot on and off since i got him, i really don’t know why. I’ve done so much treatment and water changes but it’s persistent. Anyway, he’s a happy little guy. And i just hope he knows how much i love and appreciate him. I was just thinking about how he doesn’t even know i wrote my COLLEGE ESSAY on him. That’s kinda crazy now that i think about it but i can’t explain in words how much i love him. he really started a massive life changing journey for me. Since i’ve gotten him i’ve learned a ton and i really changed a lot. He taught me patience and dedication, he taught me how to research, he changed the entire direction of my life. He got me into the whole fish keeping world. I now have a whole community tank. He also taught me how valuable these little lives are. He’s one of the most precious things to me and he’s “just a tiny little fish”. My essay is basically me explaining how i found my life’s passion (horticulture and marine science) and how bubbles is what kinda inspired that. The structure is, my friend asks me would i cry if my fish died at dinner and i said yes, they said that’s crazy and looked genuinely perplexed. The rest of the essay is basically “what i should’ve said (in response)” where i explain how this tiny little fish genuinely changed my life. Sorry im being very repetitive im tired 😭 but at the end of the essay it goes back to “so yes i would cry and blah blah blah” I dont know what im even talking about but i was just thinking that its crazy that he has no idea that exists. I really hope he knows how much i love him. I’ve had bettas all my life, i love each and every one of them dearly and equally, but something different about him, idk what it is but theres just something. He kinda “woke me up” in a sense. Idk what I’ll even do when he’s gone. I hope i can take him to college with me. I am going to sound crazy saying this but the day he goes will probably be one of the worst days in my life. I can’t explain it honestly but i just know. I’ve lost a lot of little precious lives in my life too, they don’t go unnoticed in the slightest. I still talk to them when i look in the sky and think about them pretty much every night. Right now i have my hamster bear, my budgies Skye and Dusk, two dogs bodhi and toto, and ofc all my 50 community fish. Idk what i’ll do without them either, it’s gonna be rough :(. Sorry for the yap 🙏🙏 I hope everyone has a lovely day with their little bettas <3