Betta Fish: Cloving Gone Awry! I Need To Vent!

Ok, so my little blue, dragonscale plakat, that I’ve had almost a year in January had to be euthanized due to a tumor growing in his abdomen. I’d lowered the water for weeks, made the surface more accessible, bumped up the flow on the sponge filter and he was doing fine. Eating ok. Making it up to his log for pellets. I’d shoot bloodworms down in the tank too to help him eat. Well, yesterday, his dorsal fin was just shit from working so hard to keep him up and he was lying around on the gravel and hiding. So, I knew it was finally time and I had clove on hand just for this. You guys actually spotted he had a tumor growing months ago. So, thank you. Well, I’ve never cloved a fish before and read an article which said to take a liter of his water out and in a cup (no specific measurement on how much hot water to add to the cup) add hot water and 1/8 tsp of clove oil into it. That comes out to .6 ml. So, I got a liter of his water out into a container and added him. This was depressing af btw!!!! I squirted the .6 ml of all natural clove oil into about half an 8 ounce glass and stirred it. Now this article said to add the clove mixture slowly over 5 minutes. I pulled out .5 ml of the hot water/clove cocktail and put it in the water. He thrashed immediately and then died. No sleepy time and slow hypoxia. Just instantaneous death. I might as well have flushed him down the commode. I felt like utter shit! My baby, blue boy that always did swim to me when I called his name just like a little dog wagging his tail. I can’t even look at the tank. I just start bawling. The breeder, and I give them a shout out on here all the time, Tropicflow, out of California, is going to give me a new one for free, but judiciously pick the healthiest one he (Kai, the sweetest guy, whom I’ve never met) thinks will hopefully not develop a tumor. I love the plakats best and in doing my research regarding Betta tumors, the dragon scale bettas, blue bettas that are marbled especially and the multi colored kois are most susceptible to developing tumors. My cute, little, multi colored koi Jackson also has a tumor that split his dorsal fin in two. But he’s swimming and eating just fine. Vincent, however, the tumor was in a place that greatly impaired his swimming in the end. But I digress! I’m still pissed about the clove debacle. Can anyone, as I’m sure at some point I will have to do this again with Jackson, give me the most thorough steps in performing betta euthanizing with clove so I don’t royally fuck it up again? Thank you in advance. And thank you for this forum that gives me a place to vent and grieve. I’ll see you in fish heaven one day my baby boy, Vincent Van Gogh!