Unfortunately, my darling sweetpea passed away two weeks ago. She was my first fish and one that I had prepared months in advance for, I was so excited to have her. She lived for just under a year but unfortunately developed dropsy that despite treatment that seemed to be working, I think got the best of her.
I'd been mourning her but at the same time thinking about my next tank, originally I wanted to change it up and get some smaller schooling fish instead. But one day I went to a store just to "check things out" and found this little lady there. I'd never seen a betta so colourful as her and immediately wanted her. I talked myself out of it at first but kept thinking about her. Two days later I drove back scared someone else may have taken her and found her still there. So I caved and bought her.
I'm feeling conflicted though, I feel like I didn't leave any time for myself to properly grieve, but I knew I couldn't leave this little lady there. How much time do people tend to wait before buying another fish?
https://www.reddit.com/gallery/1tg14l1
Posted by milkytoasty1
4 Comments
sometimes a new finned friend comes along at just the right time. you can miss and grieve sweetpea while loving her successor just as much
i do recommend double checking ammonia and other params to make sure your cycle hasnt lapsed in those 2 weeks if the tank was empty!
Grief aside I would’ve been slightly concerned about what killed your original fish. If the underlying cause was environmental and not addressed, you might just end up with another dead fish. Obviously if it was genetic, not an issue.
I haven’t lost a fish yet, (new to the hobby) but I keep hamsters, and have lost them before. I lost my first hamster, who I was incredibly bonded with last year, and two months later I got my current hamster. Everyone told me it was too soon, but for me seeing the cage empty hurt more. I wasn’t replacing my first baby, but I need an animal in my life. Your not replacing your first baby (who’s beautiful btw) your filling the gap they left, which isn’t a bad thing by any means. Please don’t feel guilty, I’m glad you could give a new baby a good life.
Grieving depends on the person. Each time you remember Sweet Pea, what is remembered lives. I also heard someone say “don’t be sorry it’s over, be glad it happened.” Your new sweet fish will help through the grieving process and then you can build more memories. It also sounds like you gave Sweet Pea a great life, so take comfort in that.